Jul 11, 2020

Decades of Joy


couple years ago, I realized that the majority of my life is over. That took me down a dark spiral. All the questions. All the choices. All the time that is not left. I don’t think I’m alone thinking that I have not used this life right.

Regret and worry are me misusing my imagination. So, shake it off.

Here are some buckets I'm thinking about:

  • My relationships
  • My perspective - wisdom, experience, understanding, patience, & peace
  • My health
  • My work / impact
  • My freedom
  • My environment

When I shifted my mindset to thinking 10 years out, today became much more manageable.

  1. Today is a moment in time
  2. Nothing is permanent - including today
  3. Will this matter in 10 years?

It is easy to get frustrated. Finding the ‘wrong’ is easy but making it better is hard. It is hard to realize the small things you do today ‘make your life’ in 10 years. It’s very easy to get sad / mad / frustrated with your situation now. It’s incredibly easy to blame others. It’s very hard to own your life and be okay with this moment in time being part of your journey to where you want to go.

I can craft the life I want. I also know, with absolute certainty, it won’t happen suddenly. What we have today is the result of decades of work and patience. Decades. It has taken me half a life to realize that nothing great is sudden. It takes real time. The question is what will my life be in 10 years?

White SUV stuck in mud in a valley with a man sitting nearby
I was a little stuck here - Once upon a time - ‘let’s see if we can make it down this valley’ - famous last words. Turns out further down I was sure I was never going home. 1000% sure it was game over. I said my goodbyes -  ‘Good luck boys, take care of mama’ -
But it all worked out. Hard work + patience + some friends.

Thinking that way changes my perspective. Now life is an adventure filled with moments to shape your life.  What can you do in the next 10 seconds that will shape the next 10 minutes that will shape the next 10 days that will shape the next 10 weeks and the next 10 months and ultimately the next 10 years? What can I do in the next 10 seconds to have the relationships I want? The headspace I want, the health I want, the work I want, to live where I want, and wake up each day and have the freedom to do what I want? While not forgetting that desire is the enemy of happy.

You don’t have to wait decades to enjoy the adventure. After all, it is not about waking up 10 years from now and saying ‘you made it’ but rather realizing that you are ‘making it’ each day. You are making the life you want with your choices every second. And don’t forget to stop and recognize when you ‘made it’. When what you wanted once is what you have.

This is hard stuff. But what a wonderful opportunity. An opportunity to move through the next 10 years working to be better. Working through this by taking forks in the road with friends and making more along the way. Taking the good with the bad. The joy with the suffering. Seeking to understand while taking responsibility to do the next right thing. Understanding what we control and what we don’t. And being very comfortable that the only guarantee is that it’s not going to go the way we planned.

I’m going to work to enjoy every sunrise realizing it might be my last but believing I’ve done my best. I hope my people agree. Especially my three barrel chested freedom fighters and princess buttercup.

Let’s get after the next 10 years and make incredible memories along the way. We aren’t alone.

14,999 to joyful sunrises to go. .


White SUV driving through a river
We made it. All kinds of opportunity out there. Let’s go get it.

A few 10 minute options -

“I have a list, here’s the order of the list that it’s in” - Eminem
  • Meditation
  • Writing
  • Reading
  • Exercise (yes, it can be only 10 minutes)
  • Being present with my wife
  • Being present with / for all my humans
  • Catchup with a friend
  • A letter to a friend
  • Cook something
  • Getting into what my kids are into, with them
  • Listen to music - just listen
  • Make art
  • Make something
  • A run
  • A walk
  • A nap (in a hammock, when possible)
  • A swim
  • A journal

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